Flighty. Indecisive. A leaf in the wind. These were all things I once thought about myself. My passions, my interests, my friends, my moods, and my views have always changed. And at times, these changes made me feel unsteady. I struggled with having the confidence to live a life that was continually changing. How could I seek peace from the changing times?
Safety was the thing I constantly chased. I looked at others with their established professional lives, stable incomes, and committed relationships with the envy that I would never find what grounded me. How could I feel grounded if everything around me--including me--was continually changing?
I learned that my safety wasn't attached to a job, dollar amount, or physical place--instead, an inner knowing that I could be the thing that grounded me. Journeying to the core of who I was made me realize this.
I found ways to feel safe, and, in turn, I became my own safe place, returning to myself whenever the world became too much.
Silence the Noise, Amplify the Peace
Could I be too free, too flexible, too easy?
My version of “enough” rarely matches others.
My thinking can be whimsical, and I’ve heard that I can be “stuck in the clouds.”
These thoughts were the noise I had to silence to become my own safe place. Ridding myself of distractions like these was how I nurtured the home within myself. “Silence the noise, amplify the peace” is a personal mantra I tell myself when it's time to transform into my safe place.
The world already had an agenda against me, so if I was going to become my safe place, I had to make sure one less person was plotting against me. Positive self-talk was something I became mindful of, making sure that even in my lowest moments, I was still my greatest motivator.
“The more I filtered the lens through which I viewed the world, the more my life started to look like me…”
Other distractions included what I was viewing daily. I did a complete overhaul of my Instagram feed. Consumed with the dramatic events of people’s lives who I didn’t even know, my feed countered the goal I had of only surrounding myself with positivity.
I know many people who become overwhelmed with their social media feeds and decide to take a break from it all. Although, many of these people come back months later to the same toxicity. I didn’t want to be caught in this cycle, especially since I enjoyed being on social media. So, I assessed who I was following and who was following me.
I started following the people and organizations that fed the beauty and light I saw within my spirit. The more I filtered the lens through which I viewed the world, the more my life started to look like me--which ultimately fed my spirit’s need for safety.
Amplifying the peace in my life is something I work at every day to ground myself. Safety, for me, exists when I am in environments where I can freely express my emotions, ideas, and fears without judgment or ridicule. There are many ways I amplify the peace in my life. Here are a few:
Taking mindful walks in the park in the morning helps center my thoughts. I discovered how much physical activity supports my mental well-being. Even a quick 30-minute cardio workout makes me feel energized and makes my mind sharper for my day.
Drinking tea, for me, is a meditative practice that forces me to slow down. Moving at a slow speed helps me to not feel rushed or anxious about wanting to be anywhere other than where I am at the moment.
Journaling encourages me to express myself with no judgment. At any moment of the day, I write to get it all out and to be free.
Reading books, both nonfiction and fiction, helps with my writing. I expose myself to all kinds of beautiful stories that take my mind to a faraway place.
Watching Youtube videos typically soothes me to sleep. I enjoy watching videos on just about anything, from hair tutorials, mindful living tips to music videos.
Life becomes a lot more liveable when I am at peace with my choices, decisions, and feelings. Doing all of the things listed above helps me feel in control of my life, which offers me a sense of safety and grounding.
A Home Within Ourselves
I know that with me, I am safe. My discovery of how to ground myself hopefully provides others with small ways to live life on their terms, despite any distractions that may exist. I hope that others can learn to nurture the home within themselves.
“...when I look at my life, I am grateful that it mirrors my heart’s truest desires.”
I hope that together we can accept that we are our safe places. I hope we can turn inward when life’s pressures make us feel lost, confused, or heartbroken. My ability to turn inward allows me to consider how I truly feel inside. This introspection grants me a clarity that helps me move through the world in ways that make me proud to be me.
I’ve reconsidered the thought that I’m just a leaf in the wind--I’m anything but that. I do have a solid place in this world, and when I look at my life, I am grateful that it mirrors my heart’s truest desires.
I am grounded because there is a very familiar, safe place inside myself that I can turn into without hesitation. I can hold onto myself and feel confident that I will never let me go since the best parts of me live on in everything I do.